Thursday, November 22, 2012

20 Things That Would Make Football More Enjoyable

Epic Football or Warball could include some or any of the following 20 possibilities. In its most basic form, it would be football, but this is a much better way to play football. All possibilities are legal (probably) and would be enjoyable to watch. Of course, no one would employ all of the following in one game, but using a few of these at least would make the game much more entertaining.
  1. Uneven terrain - the possibility of tripping, hiding behind small hills, an occasional tunnell or small cave (with cameras of course)
  2. The ability to "imprision" players of the opposite team
  3. Some players on each team are given paintball guns or water guns
  4. A Capture-the-Flag variation
  5. Alternate winning scenarios - you can win by catching the opponent's flag in their End Zone and bringing it back to your own, by imprisoning their team captain for a specific amount of time without his escape, etc.
  6. Playground equipment along each End Zone that players must get through.
  7. Game Makers (like in The Hunger Games)
  8. Geysers
  9. Slow-moving animals wandering aimlessly between each yard line
  10. If the referees had tasers (although this would be more interesting, I wouldn't actually want this to be real life, or we wouldn't have any players)
  11. Slip n' Slides
  12. Three teams, instead of two
  13. Every few minutes, the ball drastically changes in temperature or texture (normal to hot to normal to slimy to normal etc)
  14. Martial Arts are allowed within normal MMA tournament rules.
  15. Alternative terrains, like sand or ice
  16. Trampolines
  17. Multiple platforms or tiers
  18. Some players may be on stilts or moonboots
  19. Pogosticks and skateboards placed around the field
  20. Holes in the ground
If anyone else agrees that warball would be more fun than just football, we should get this started. Also, I think Warball might already be the name of a game, so Epic Football might have to be the official title.

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Worries Fly Away

The damp prison had been built miles beneath the surface, a place where the carefree were sent to learn of reality. Dirt and rot of dying rats or people penetrated every intake of breath. The sky to us became a black ceiling where soot gathered, kept still by the moist heat. The heavy weights we were chained to in the deep earth were hardly a problem compared to the heavy air. Still, the blame for my misery there could only be given to me.

As a child, I lived at the foothills of the mountains - just outside of the city. I looked up at the cold, white peaks reaching the stars and believed that I would cross them. Encouragement came with a stranger who told us about the other side. He said that he could take us over, however I considered myself too young to leave home and I stayed with my family, the place that I knew. I told myself it was just for now. As I grew older, the possibility of leaving seemed nearer and more opportune than ever, so I packed my bags, and told my family I would be off for bigger and better things, though I did not yet know exactly what.

The elders of the city gaped at me - how could I leave all of this responsibility behind me? It was beyond their comprehension. I had things to do there, and someday my parents would be old and I would have them to care for. They questioned me - what would become of my younger siblings? I looked up into the peaks. They were dangerous, after all. It would be easy to slip on a landslide. And then what would happen? I'd die, of course. I finally gave in. They were right... it was unreasonable to drop everything and climb the mountains.

Over time, the world became bleak. Our city had been under the ruling of a tyrant from far away, and they threatened to send more soldiers but no one wanted to look in their direction - it was too frightening. There was a day when the skies finally blackened and soldiers from a foreign land marched upon us. Some of us were killed, but most were only taken as slaves. "If you leave," they told us, "the ones you leave behind will be killed." Over time, however, we integrated into their culture. It was not long before our city was surrounded by black walls, black houses, soot and stray dogs. The trees I knew so well were torn down to make way for worldly inventions.

These invaders were from another part of the valley, but we had never paid them much mind before, and now, after they destroyed our homes, we didn't pay them much mind either. Silently we despised them, whilst outwardly we laughed with them and worked for them. It was all the cycle of life, after all.

Sometimes on rare occasion, I would find myself in a place of the city where I could see the peaks. I would look upon them for a long period of time and wonder what would have happened if I had climbed long ago. I could be free, I thought. Yet all I did was shake my head and return to what I suddenly realized was living death. I grimaced and continued, despite my discovery.

As time passed us all by, my emotions fell behind me. I became stiff, bored, and exhausted. I resented the rules, but continued to obey them. Then my mother passed away. My father passed away. The elders passed away and I no longer saw my siblings. One day the stranger returned, but none of us cared. He said he would take us through the mountains and show us how to live and be free, but we would have to let go of everything we had here.

Every one of us shrugged it off and let him sadly disappear into the mountains. "I will return when you are ready," he stated. If I had been younger, I may have rolled my eyes. Instead I reaffixed my life back to my job, the people around me, and my masters in the valley. This faulty peace did not last long, however. There came a day when a man had disobeyed and we were all punished. We had not eaten for two days, and I could no longer think properly. So, I went to my master's house and I stole from him. When we were confronted, I confessed quickly to get it over with. My master was displeased and punished us further. Soon, fights broke out and a rebellion started. After all, they had always despised us as much as we despised them. It ended with everyone of our kind in a prison beneath the earth.

They reminded us daily that we were in the earth because it was reality. Reality, we were reminded, is a troublesome place but we must learn to deal with it, and even enjoy it. Reality, we were reminded, was not a hopeful place, but some place dark, so pleasure must be taken wherever, and they taught us to be gluttonous when we had the chance. They taught us that our success is made by pleasing others and having others respect you for becoming great in their eyes. We learned that we were part of the world there and would have to live with it if we wanted to have our part of the valley. We were taught, we learned and we accepted.

While chained in the dismal deep, there was one day I realized that I was not part of this world. I could never belong to this world, and I would never be happy with my valley. I was not happy with it when it was normal. It had been barren and it was difficult to survive. The elders were overbearing and I had felt very controlled. I did not belong in the valley.

I waited then for the stranger to return. After all, only he knew the way to freedom. We could climb the mountains ourselves, but our elders had been correct - the mountains were dangerous and it would be irresponsible to leave anyone behind without inviting them. I gathered the others to me and shared my thoughts. No one agreed. I waited alone for the stranger to return, but I felt noticeably more free. Suddenly the things that happened here did not matter because I would go beyond the mountains.

At one point I thought the stranger would never come. My thoughts teetered on the precipice of my sanity. Blood and dirt were so common to my eyes that I might have found comfort in them, had I chosen to lose the hope I had. It was at this point when the stranger came for me. He came to my prison bars and asked "Would you like to go now? You cannot return if you come with me, but you will be free." My eyes and my weak smile replied for me.

So easily, he opened the door, as though it had never been locked - he had bought me, after all. He unfastened the chains around my wrists, ankles and neck like they had never been forged together and I was free. How long had I been there? I did not even recall the length of time.

Like magic, no guards came running to send me back, and even if they had, I felt I had the confidence to stand up to them - as long as the stranger was there. We exited quietly, and I bathed in a small creek outside of the city. I was not able to remove all of the dirt, but it was good enough.

Although we were out of the city, the mountains loomed before us like the city's massive black walls, their peaks hidden among the gray clouds in the morning. Their slopes were as barren as the valley below, and dust caked back onto my skin. As we climbed higher, I grew tired and ill. The oxygen thinned, and the cold air dried me. The dust etched its way into thin cuts that developed on my hands and feet from dehydration. Headaches and stiff winds followed us to the top. Although I was ill, the stranger stayed with me. He was never sick like I was, but it pained him to see me suffering, like I were family he had known all his life. I still feared he would leave me behind. I was afraid that he was a fake, or that the blue skies, white clouds and greenery would beckon his imagination as it did mine. "If you are worried that I might leave you, call on me," he told me like he had read my mind.

"But I do not know your name," I replied.

He hugged me and whispered it in my ear. His arms somehow made me warm against the wildest wind and coldest snow. He had felt the cold and the wind. He knew what it was, yet as he passed through the pass day after day, he was no longer susceptible to it.

Gray hung above us, darkening my mood. Gray blew around me, shoving us this way and that. Gray was the ground beneath us, holding our frozen feet fast to the top of the mountain, but red warmth was between us. As we dipped below the fog and the rocks beneath us retreated into a downward slope, The snow gave way to sights I hadn't imagined. Fields of blossoms cloaked the grassy hillsides until they met forests of pines. Sparkling brooks cascaded into steaming, swirling pools.

The slopes flattened at the bottom into moss-covered rocks and open plains. I saw the shadows of white clouds move gently across the wind-blown grass, slowly making their way out to a blue expanse. The closer we came to it, the more I could tell - this was the sea. The freshness of the air penetrated my world. My muscles could relax, as my ears only recalled the sound of birds crying, and tons of water splashing and retreating over and over.

"Are you worried about the ones you left behind?" the stranger inquired.

"Yes, of course..." I replied, uncertain if he would ask me to go back. "If only they could see this! I can't imagine returning to the city."

"Then I will go back for them, but I can only save them if they wish for it. Anyone who would prefer to live in the valley at the city may stay, and anyone who would prefer to come to me may come."

I thought of this as my doubts ebbed away. I had made it here, guided by the stranger who never left my side. If they wanted to, they could as well. The few others who had crossed the mountains joined me to feast and to dance. Not one of them wished they had stayed behind, and no one who stayed behind had been denied by the stranger. Immersed in beauty and love of the world around me, my worries took wings and flew away.

“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal; but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."
Matthew 6:19-21

Friday, June 29, 2012

The Gates of Hell

I gave this such an enticing title, but it really isn't that exciting. Sorry for the letdown.

Pretty much, I've just been having a terrible week, and I don't feel like its the end of my problems. To begin with, last week I had a terrible headache and then my period began (sorry, I know you males didn't really want to hear that, but it is a natural process for more than half of the population and it causes issues). I became a bit confused and tired. This progressed into a physical exhaustion that left me stranded upon couches for nearly a week. To some degree, I will admit that I enjoyed my illness, as I needed a break. The upcoming wedding, my job, the financial situation and my living situation were all weighing on my quite a bit.

When I returned to work this past Wednesday, I felt great until after lunch when I received the news that my father had an allergic reaction to the antibiotic he was taking. He was taken to the Intensive Care Unit at the hospital until he recovered. Meanwhile at home, the dog that I've had and loved since I was six years old passed out in the backyard. She was taken to the vet clinic, but we had to put her down the following morning. Yesterday we also buried her. RIP Pebbles, best dog in the world.

During this time, our dog Tribble had been boarding somewhere, as we have a dog in heat at the house and we do not want her bred just yet. Tribble was driving everyone insane with his 24/7 whining fest. Late last night, he ran away and has not returned.

So, it has been a bad week and now I feel like I am relapsing into my virus again. I would really like to pass out.

I also just noticed a diamond in my engagement ring fell out.

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Airbending to Colorado

There are a lot of updates that need to occur with this blog. Perhaps someday in 4,000 years I will actually attempt them. Like on that day when I'm not too tired or busy.

Anyway, today I am blogging a short bit about an awesome dream I had last night. In this dream, I had an airbending staff. If you are not aware, the thing the animated child is holding in the picture below is an airbending staff, or an airbending glider.

 Though I could not airbend or anything in the dream, I could still fly around. It was some new invention or something. I'm not really sure how it worked, except I was suddenly able to travel across America in a day, and take a trip to any place I wanted to, just as a simple day trip. I was SO HAPPY. I kept going at night though, which apparently was going to get me into trouble. I wanted to fly to Colorado, but first I went to Vancouver on the West Coast, and apparently there was one on the East Coast as well. I don't remember why or how I got this glider thing, but suddenly I was FREE! I think I did do something illegal though I don't remember what, and somehow my brother Coyt and my fiance Justin met me on the East Coast. We were all considering quitting our jobs and taking flights around the world. I was totes going to glide to Colorado that night, after we visited Coyt's pick, which was Texas for some reason.

So yes, I thought I'd just share the BEST DREAM EVER. I want to travel across the country on a glider any time I so desire.

Monday, May 21, 2012

Sleep Deprivation

Today I am just going to ramble. This is because I am tired. So really, I will be rambling about being tired. Why am I tired? I stayed up too late last night, and I woke up a bit earlier than usual this morning.

I personally think being sleepy may be similar to taking a small dose of a depressant. I currently feel like I might be on the pain medication I was taking after I had my wisdom teeth removed. However, I know that I am not, unless my milk was drugged. Or potentially, my broccoli cheddar soup. I did drink green tea as well, but green tea has caffeine and therefore would not necessarily induce sleep. It is relaxing though. So is being sleepy.

I heard somewhere that sleep-deprived driving causes more accidents than drunk driving. I do not know if it was true, but it would make sense. I feel like my head may not be connected to my body right now.

I have spent some time to look up some facts about Sleep Deprivation. I had them copied and pasted in here, but I decided to just put the website link up instead, since it was all directly from it: I am unaware of whether any of this is true or not, but I put it up anyway. #irresponsible

I would just like to say, being a female on that time of the month does my brains no good either. Perhaps that was TMI for you, but I can't say that I care. I am too tired to care. But don't worry. I'm not scary. Typically the only way you can tell if I'm on it is if I am sleepy and potentially in pain.

Although my stomach hurts very much and I feel like I am on a significant dosage of pain meds, I am also ecstatic right now. I have TWO monitors at work now. That's right, TWO. I am writing this from my second monitor. It is beautiful. Actually, it is the exact same as my other monitor, but it is still wonderful. I had to cram a lot of my origami to other parts of my cubicle, but that is okay. It has been worth it. Also one of our wonderful supervisors has fixed an important program that didn't open for me before. This will make my days far less infuriating.

Still, my lifelong dream right now is to go home and sleep. I feel like I could just sleep through the rest of my life. It sounds amazing right now. It is nothing against being awake, just that I am simply so tired, and sleeping sounds like such a magnificent luxury that I am nearly certain I could be happy if I just never woke up again. I am not allowed though, because I do have a fiance and a family and I think they would be pretty upset. So would several of my friends.

Friday, May 18, 2012

Origami Mice

Although I can smash the "beginner" level, I cannot win at chess on "easy". I will now return to folding small, origami mice.

Sunday, May 6, 2012

The Paradox of Right

This is one of the main messages I wish people would pick up on. I've posted it in lots of places already, but it belongs on my blog, also. The following blog is about what I call the Paradox of Right.

Everyone always thinks their right, right? (speaking of beliefs and opinions, not of actions)

If people thought that they were wrong, then the world would just fall apart. You can't believe in something you call wrong. I'm sure everybody knows this (at least in the back of their heads) but its sort of hard to think about. What if people thought they were wrong, yet they believed in it anyway? I'm fairly certain that can lead to insanity.

But everyone is not right, yet still, we have to think we are, or else things will not make any sense. Imagine if we all believed we were wrong, but still believed it. As I stated, we would probably go insane. We must think we are right. All the time.

So, since we cannot think we are wrong and still believe in something, then we must establish our opinions. After all, with no opinions, we would discover nothing. Take science into consideration: no one would find any answers to their questions if they did not believe in what they were searching for.

However, as stated, everyone is not right. More than likely, everyone is wrong, at least to some extent. This is a very humbling thought for humanity. Each individual human absolutely MUST believe they are right, or at least probably right, but at the same time KNOW that they are wrong and probably wrong. (How very paradoxical)

Therefore, you cannot prove to anyone that you are right unless they already partially believe you. Least of all and not even ignorance can be proven wrong. Someone who is wrong who believes they are right will be so absolutely convinced they are right because they are ignorant of their incorrectness. You can prove nothing to such a wall. In the meantime, you can’t believe anything new, and no one can prove anything to you unless you are open to the possibility that they are correct.

Moreover, you can't judge another for thinking they are right because they can't think that they are wrong. And neither can you. Thus is the curse of humankind, and why we continue to fight. "Why can't we get along?" is easy to answer with this simple explanation. We cannot get along because we believe we are right. If you do not believe in something, then what do you amount to and why are you alive? But if you choose something to believe in, then you will have to be forced to accept that you are potentially wrong. Or you could just continue convincing yourself that you are right.

Of course, then you must wonder. Someone must be right somewhere. I do not believe that individual is human. But that is only my opinion.

So in conclusion of the previous statements: just because you’re right, doesn’t mean you’re right, because everyone else is also right whether they are actually right or not.

Before I completely close this blog, there is a Part Two that you may enjoy. The Paradox of Right explains how futile it is to beat a dead horse. The following is from a page online that my brother found regarding the beating of dead horses.

"Dakota tribal wisdom says that when you discover you are riding a dead horse, the best strategy is to dismount. However, in business we often try other strategies with dead horses, including the following:

1. Buying a stronger whip.

2. Changing riders.

3. Say things like, "This is the way we have always ridden this horse."

4. Appointing a committee to study the horse.

5. Arranging to visit other sites to see how they ride dead horses.

6. Increasing the standards to ride dead horses.

7. Appointing a tiger team to revive the dead horse.

8. Creating a training session to increase our riding ability.

9. Comparing the state of dead horses in today's environment.

10. Change the requirements declaring that "This horse is not dead."

11. Hire contractors to ride the dead horse.

12. Harnessing several dead horses together for increased speed.

13. Declaring that "No horse is too dead to beat."

14. Providing additional funding to increase the horse's performance.

15. Do a Cost Analysis study to see if contractors can ride it cheaper.

16. Purchase a product to make dead horses run faster.

17. Declare the horse is "better, faster and cheaper" dead.

18. Form a quality circle to find uses for dead horses.

19. Revisit the performance requirements for horses.

20. Say this horse was procured with cost as an independent variable.

21. Promote the dead horse to a supervisory position.

Saturday, April 7, 2012

Car Wrecks and Other Bad Days

A bad day has two sides. First, there is the surface: you got in a car wreck, you lost your wedding ring, you forgot to bring lunch to work and ran out of money, you're low on sleep and had to handle a very irritating situation at work... the list could go on.

Today I am having one of those days, but as I waited for two hours in my car by the side of the road for the police to come, I decided to put my Muse and Incubus away (great musicians, though clearly atheist), and instead I slid a self-created mix of worship music to comfort me. It wasn't too long before I was listening to a song called "Hallelujahs" by Chris Rice (no, perhaps not the most original title, but you must admit, "hallelujah" is a really awesome word). It described beautiful things in nature.

At one point, he mentions a breaching whale. Every time I hear this line, I imagine myself on a beach at night. The sky is navy blue and starry, and sometimes I picture there to be a glowing white disc in the distance (the moon). The violet waves are gently lapping the beach, not substantial enough to create a lot of foam. These waves are cool and they blanket my feet for a moment, pulling the sand from beneath and around them, so that when the water has retreated, I am almost to my ankles in sand. Out in the ocean, the water is sparkling. There is no light to do this, except the stars and the moon. But then, the surface is disturbed as a great, dark creature rears itself from the water. It is far from the shore, but you can see that it is huge. It moves gracefully back under, and then swims up again, only to flop on the surface, like its playing.

That image stuck with me too heavily for me to think of any others, but it was powerful. It was at this point I paid attention to the second side of a bad day: the resolution. If God is big enough, powerful enough, and wonderful enough to create oceans and whales and all sorts of things that were abstract ideas before, then why am I worried about so many things today? They are things that I will need to solve, but nothing truly important has been compromised. Instead, I have been building my faith. I had a car wreck, but if God can raise mountains, calm storms and form the very sky that I stand under, then there is no reason to fear the loss of things only made valuable by other men.

Saturday, February 25, 2012


There are six very important books (or series) to me for various reasons, and I very much wish to write something brief about each one. I am not including the Bible, if you are curious.

1. The Harry Potter Series, by J.K. Rowling. This series made me aware of the joy of reading. I had read other books before, but I usually had to force my way through. I eventually learned that horse books bore me. But Harry Potter made me read. It was fun, imaginative, and inspiring. Not to mention, it wasn't wrought with long boring descriptions about things no one cares for.

2. The Giver, by Lois Lowry. This book represents everything I believe in. It is commonly mistaken for a children's story, but it typically isn't very clear to the average American child. It is about love, it is about control, and it is about safety versus beauty. It is also short and to the point, with a very open ending that I appreciate.

3. The Book Thief, by Marcus Zusak. I haven't cried so much while reading a book in my life. This story is really an eye-opener on life in Germany during World War Two, and not as a Jew, but as a poor German child. It is cute, it is funny, it is deep, and it is dark. This story has some of the most creative and effective methods of telling itself. It introduced me to the horrors and the irony of humankind.

4. Ender's Game, by Orson Scott Card. This is another that reminds me of the irony in humankind. This is the book that has probably made me think the most. It is very deep and philosophical. You can read the description and think "Really?" because it sounds just like every other sci-fi alien thing you've heard of, but this story goes beyond itself. It isn't about destroying the aliens. This story is about saving the main character, and ultimately about what humans really are. It explores the good and the bad in humanity. I've read this somewhere between 5 and 8 times, and it is still very good.

5. The Phantom Tollbooth, by Norton Juster. If you are looking for a quirky story, The Phantom Tollbooth is it. This most certainly is a children's book, but it is a children's book that everyone can enjoy. It should be a Pixar or Dreamworks animation. Nothing compares to how mind-bending, imaginative, clever and fun this story is. Everyone should read this book at some point in their life. It emphasizes the importance of intelligence, it makes you laugh, and it makes you think without being dark or scary. I would put a quote here, but to choose my favorite I'd have to put the entire book.

6. Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell, by Susanna Clarke. This book didn't have to make me think deeply. It was clever and imaginative, but ultimately with this book I just seriously felt like I accomplished something. This book is more than a thousand pages long. I persevered because it was an entertaining story, and I felt smart reading it. The British humor is fantastic, the characters are colorful, and the imagery is exquisite.

So those are the six most important books that I plan to always own and revisit occasionally. If you have not read any of these books, please read them. Well, I'd forgive you if you did not read JS&Mr.N. It is a tedious venture. But I do believe that specifically, Ender's Game and The Book Thief are something to attempt, while The Phantom Tollbooth, and The Giver are books that everyone should be required to read. About 3/4ths of the population has read Harry Potter so I'm not worried about that.

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Misconception: Christians "Love" God to Get to Heaven

Actually, you could take that title either way. It isn't entirely a misconception. The real misconception at the base of that is what Heaven is.

Heaven is where God is. Heaven is being with God, surrounded by him. Heaven could be ugly, brown, gray and dusty; but if it has God then it is worth it. That's what Heaven is. It isn't the streets paved with gold. It isn't the promised places that he prepared for us. It isn't the soft green grass or harps or halos or clouds. Heaven is being with God. I'm in heaven when I'm with God.

Now if you aren't Christian, you are wondering why I think Heaven is so great if it isn't about the pretty stuff in the sky. If you've never been in God's presence then you wouldn't know and I can't explain it. The most I can explain to you is why I love God and why I want to be with him forever.

I love God because in the very beginning, when humanity betrayed him, he promised he would rescue us. I love God because when his people were starving in the desert, he provided them food. When their enemies threatened to destroy them, he led them to victories, accomplishing more than they could have dreamed. When they were slaves, he even gave their slave-owners chance after chance to relinquish them. When they did not, he still rescued his people. He protected and rescued the good, and he wiped out the bad so that good could thrive. Although he makes it clear that women should be women and men should be men, he also esteems them equally. There are many strong and powerful women in the Bible, like Esther. He esteems all creation equally, and understands their places.

I love God because he, a shining being of all-powerful royalty, beautiful in every way, dressed in rags and walked among the lowest places of the earth as a hick from Nazarene. Saying Jesus of Nazareth was like saying Albert of the Midwest back then. I love him because he taught us how to survive in the desert and how to survive in our own personal wildernesses. He gave us hope. God allowed himself to be beaten and speared and tossed into the fiery pits of Hell by taking on all of the burdens we've borne. He carried everything I've ever done - the time I told my brother I hated him, the time I screamed and embarrassed my parents. The times I thought mean and rude things about my classmates, the times I've hurt my parents or lied to someone. He carried the weight of that to Hell so I wouldn't have to.

I love God because he has healed me. Again, and again and again. He has brought me through dark places so I could find beautiful ones. The darker the place I've gone through, the more incredible the things on the other side. I love him because he loved me first. He has pursued me, and not only me, but everyone. He is with us at all times. When your parents didn't do a good enough job, when your brother or sister leaves you, when the person you married fails you, and when your friends drift away, he is always there.

So if you wonder, just remember the list. That isn't even a specific list. But if I were specific, it would be a TLDR* situation and that isn't necessary at this point.

Christians don't pretend to love an imaginary being they can't see out of fears that they won't reach the place with golden streets. Maybe people think they are Christians and do that, but a true Christian isn't in it for that kind of material reward. In the Bible it describes God as being with Abraham and Isaac and everyone in the ancient times. It describes God as being in us after Jesus leaves. In that sense, we know he is there and do not have to see him. We know he is there and we love him because of it. We love him because while he is in us, we can understand it when he speaks to us and teaches us. And while he is in us here, we want to be surrounded by him. That is why we love him, and that is why we want to get to Heaven. It is because we want to get to where God is.

*Too Long Didn't Read

"Brain Fog"

I would like to describe "brain fog".

Imagine your brain is an open landscape. Its vast, open and empty. Just some green grass, flowers and bunnies etc. You can walk among this landscape and easily find anything you require. If you would like to pick a flower, it is easy to find it and see it on the ground. This is your mind as a child.

Now pretend like there are a few scattered trees here and there. They may block some vision, but they are useful. These are the things that you need to know or do, like class assignments or chores. Sometimes they are very annoying and make it difficult for you to find the right piece of information that you need, but they also produce fruit etc. Even if the trees are fairly thick, it isn't too bad because you can find everything. This is your mind when you are a tween or older child.

Now imagine that you are worrying about keeping all of your plants watered. You need some rain. When it does rain, everything continues to work as it should. You are happy, though while it is raining it is hard to find things again. Also not so pleasant. You have many more trees now because you are a teenager, though of course, when you reach college, you are aware you will have more trees, so you plant trees of worry just in case you need them ahead of time. But these worrisome trees really only block your view and soak up more water than necessary. Your landscape is not yet ready to hold so many trees.

Then, as you are fretting and worrying about more rain, you accidentally get a thick fog, instead. Everything is kept moist, we think, but there are many trees now, and this dense fog makes it nearly impossible to find anything unless it is less than three feet in front of you. The fog makes it hard for you to locate the information/trees that you need and you find yourself distracted instead with whatever thing you find in your three foot radius. You can do quite well once you push through the brain fog, or if what you need is within three feet, but it fairly difficult to locate something say, fifty feet away.

So from an outsider's point of view, if I am not thinking of the same thing they are, I will not give an accurate response because I will spout out whatever is nearest to me. If they are asking me a question and I think about something else that I know is wrong, I will stare at them blankly because I am having a hard time discovering what exactly is the correct answer. It is buried in fog. If someone tells me something important, I will gladly plant a tree for it, but I will not be able to recall it later if I wander away - which I inevitably will because I will need to search through the fog for something else in the meantime.

I also get tired much faster, pushing like that, and my eyes have trouble focusing on things because everything has to be so close.

Brains are meant to be clear of fog. Mine is not.